June 8
"All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me ... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you." - Walt Disney
Those who love in the Lord never see each other for the last time. - German Proverb
A pipe burst in a doctor's house, and he called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! Even I don't make that much as a doctor!"
The plumber waited for him to finish and quietly said, "Neither did I when I was a doctor."
Election watch. First they waffled and then they gave syrupy answers.
A View from the Tax-collector’s booth:
*This was not a position you could go back to once you left it. A tax collector was a job sought after by the greedy because they cheated and they made a good living. There would be many standing in line to take Matthew’s place once he left. He gave up a lot to follow Jesus.
*He didn’t have many friends. Everyone hated the tax collector! This “pre-IRS” job left one lonely and despised. The wife and children of these men were not treated well, either.
*No one trusted these men. Not only were they known for cheating, they also had made “strange bedfellows” with the Roman government. A Jew working for Rome did not lend to a “healthy, faith-building, faith-encouraging lifestyle.”
A View from Heaven
When Jesus visited Matthew’s tax collector booth, his reputation took a bad “hit.” Now He “cavorted with sinners and even ate with them.” In verses 10-13, however, we must look closely at what is happening here. The Pharisees are “building it their way” while Matthew and, many tax collectors and “sinners” wanted to eat with this Jesus--that was a show of honor--and find another set of blue-prints for a very lonely and crumbling lifestyle.
A pickpocket was appearing in court for a series of petty crimes. "Mr. Brewster," the judge said, "you are hereby found guilty and fined the sum of $150."
After consulting with his client, Mr. Brewster's lawyer stood up and said, "Your Honor, my client is a little short at this time. He has only $125 in his pocket, but if you would allow him a few minutes in the crowd..."
I had amnesia once -- or twice.
Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
It is alright to be content with what you have but never with what you are.
If you want to master temptation, let the Master master you.
Hindsight is an exact science.
Americans buy everything else, why not the big lie?
I have heard people testify to being any number of sordid or contemptible characters, including murderers and thieves, but I can’t remember anyone ever admitting to being a gossiper.
In keeping with the climate of tolerance, history has decided to do away with Attila the Hun’s moniker and designate him as something more benign and euphemistic: “Attila the Warm and Friendly Subjugator.”
Sometimes it gets so hot in my area of the country, birds have to use potholders to pull a worm from the ground.
Young folks need older adults in their lives. Older adults are the "Oak Tree's" of our society. They have deep roots and can stand the storms of life. They offer shade and comfort to the weary. In time of danger they can offer shelter. In times of desperation and disappointment they offer a place of solace and understanding.- Pauline Voyles
When life caves in, you do not need reasons - you need comfort.
You do not need answers - you need someone.
And Jesus does not come to us with an explanation -
He comes to us with His presence. - Bob Benson
"Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything." - Napoleon Hill
"Don't just do something, sit there! Sit there long enough each morning to decide what is really important during the day ahead."-- Richard Eyre
"Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon." - Susan Ertz
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married and she didn't have to hear about how well his Mother cooked.
SHOUT FOR JOY!
"Like a victorious locker room," says Philip Yancey, "church is a place to exult, to give thanks, to celebrate the good news that all is forgiven, that God is love, that victory is certain." Have you ever noticed how the celebration goes after a World Series, Super Bowl, or Junior Soccer Match? The players who made errors, missed their assignments, and dropped passes are just as excited and happy as the ones who hit home runs or kicked winning goals. If you're on Christ's team, you get to shout for joy over what he has done and to march in the victory parade. But somebody says she doesn't feel like celebrating. Another pipes up to say he is nothing but a loser. "My health is rotten!" protests someone. "I'm on the verge of losing my job, and I don't know how we can keep from losing our house," cries another. "My divorce will be final next week," says a trembling voice, "and I never meant to be alone at this point in my life."
Listen up! You're not a "loser." And despite the distress, sleepless nights, or uncertain markets, you still have reason to cheer - if you know Jesus Christ.
Think about sports memorabilia for a moment. A few days ago, I walked through a collection of bats, balls, jerseys, and other sports items that were too expensive for me even to handle - much less consider buying. A baseball that once cost only a few dollars is worth several thousand because Babe Ruth held it in his hands and wrote his name on it. A football that might sell for $20 is worth hundreds because Troy Aikman has held and signed it. Most baseball cards are worth the paper they're printed on. A signed Ted Williams card my son has in his collection is worth a few hundred because the legendary player once held it in his hands and signed his name on it. Are you following me? Do you get the point? You're not just another sales rep, truck driver, or programmer. Even if you don't make headlines or tons of money, you're valuable. In spite of the fact that you're embarrassed about something in the past or scared of something in your future, you matter. So you can stop selling yourself short. If you have been held in Christ's hands and have the signature mark of the Spirit of God your heart, you are saved. You have a reason for living. And you have a future that is secure. You're no loser, my friend. You are the child of the King!
Two elderly, excited Southern women were sitting together in the front pew of church listening to a fiery preacher.
When this preacher condemned the sin of stealing, these two ladies cried out at the tops of their lungs, "AMEN, BROTHER!"When the preacher condemned the sin of lust, they yelled again, "PREACH IT, REVEREND!"
And when the preacher condemned the sin of lying, they jumped to their feet and screamed, "RIGHT ON, BROTHER! TELL IT LIKE IT IS... AMEN!"
But when the preacher condemned the sin of gossip, the two got very quiet. One turned to the other and said, "He's quit preaching and now he's meddlin'."
I don't know what's wrong with my television set. I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network both on the same channel. . . . . . .I actually bought a congressman!
When our local doctor began attending church services the minister was absolutely delighted, and it wasn't long before they were helping each other in their work; the minister referring people to the doctor, and vice versa.
One referral from the doctor called at the church office with a note prescribing the minister's last four sermons. The minister was most pleased until he discovered that.... the patient's problem was insomnia!
Shelly was complaining about her husband to her friend Kelly again.
"Surely," said Kelly, "there must be SOMETHING the two of you have in common?"
Shelly replies, "Well, come to think of it, yes.... we got married on the same day."
The best way to avoid temptation is to avoid the tempting situation.
Don't ever come to church without coming as though it were the first time, as though it could be the best time, and as though it might be the last time. -- Vance Havner
The astronaut on the moon decided to look for water, so he pulled out a 3 iron.
Those who love in the Lord never see each other for the last time. - German Proverb
A pipe burst in a doctor's house, and he called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! Even I don't make that much as a doctor!"
The plumber waited for him to finish and quietly said, "Neither did I when I was a doctor."
Election watch. First they waffled and then they gave syrupy answers.
A View from the Tax-collector’s booth:
*This was not a position you could go back to once you left it. A tax collector was a job sought after by the greedy because they cheated and they made a good living. There would be many standing in line to take Matthew’s place once he left. He gave up a lot to follow Jesus.
*He didn’t have many friends. Everyone hated the tax collector! This “pre-IRS” job left one lonely and despised. The wife and children of these men were not treated well, either.
*No one trusted these men. Not only were they known for cheating, they also had made “strange bedfellows” with the Roman government. A Jew working for Rome did not lend to a “healthy, faith-building, faith-encouraging lifestyle.”
A View from Heaven
When Jesus visited Matthew’s tax collector booth, his reputation took a bad “hit.” Now He “cavorted with sinners and even ate with them.” In verses 10-13, however, we must look closely at what is happening here. The Pharisees are “building it their way” while Matthew and, many tax collectors and “sinners” wanted to eat with this Jesus--that was a show of honor--and find another set of blue-prints for a very lonely and crumbling lifestyle.
A pickpocket was appearing in court for a series of petty crimes. "Mr. Brewster," the judge said, "you are hereby found guilty and fined the sum of $150."
After consulting with his client, Mr. Brewster's lawyer stood up and said, "Your Honor, my client is a little short at this time. He has only $125 in his pocket, but if you would allow him a few minutes in the crowd..."
I had amnesia once -- or twice.
Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
It is alright to be content with what you have but never with what you are.
If you want to master temptation, let the Master master you.
Hindsight is an exact science.
Americans buy everything else, why not the big lie?
I have heard people testify to being any number of sordid or contemptible characters, including murderers and thieves, but I can’t remember anyone ever admitting to being a gossiper.
In keeping with the climate of tolerance, history has decided to do away with Attila the Hun’s moniker and designate him as something more benign and euphemistic: “Attila the Warm and Friendly Subjugator.”
Sometimes it gets so hot in my area of the country, birds have to use potholders to pull a worm from the ground.
Young folks need older adults in their lives. Older adults are the "Oak Tree's" of our society. They have deep roots and can stand the storms of life. They offer shade and comfort to the weary. In time of danger they can offer shelter. In times of desperation and disappointment they offer a place of solace and understanding.- Pauline Voyles
When life caves in, you do not need reasons - you need comfort.
You do not need answers - you need someone.
And Jesus does not come to us with an explanation -
He comes to us with His presence. - Bob Benson
"Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything." - Napoleon Hill
"Don't just do something, sit there! Sit there long enough each morning to decide what is really important during the day ahead."-- Richard Eyre
"Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon." - Susan Ertz
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married and she didn't have to hear about how well his Mother cooked.
SHOUT FOR JOY!
"Like a victorious locker room," says Philip Yancey, "church is a place to exult, to give thanks, to celebrate the good news that all is forgiven, that God is love, that victory is certain." Have you ever noticed how the celebration goes after a World Series, Super Bowl, or Junior Soccer Match? The players who made errors, missed their assignments, and dropped passes are just as excited and happy as the ones who hit home runs or kicked winning goals. If you're on Christ's team, you get to shout for joy over what he has done and to march in the victory parade. But somebody says she doesn't feel like celebrating. Another pipes up to say he is nothing but a loser. "My health is rotten!" protests someone. "I'm on the verge of losing my job, and I don't know how we can keep from losing our house," cries another. "My divorce will be final next week," says a trembling voice, "and I never meant to be alone at this point in my life."
Listen up! You're not a "loser." And despite the distress, sleepless nights, or uncertain markets, you still have reason to cheer - if you know Jesus Christ.
Think about sports memorabilia for a moment. A few days ago, I walked through a collection of bats, balls, jerseys, and other sports items that were too expensive for me even to handle - much less consider buying. A baseball that once cost only a few dollars is worth several thousand because Babe Ruth held it in his hands and wrote his name on it. A football that might sell for $20 is worth hundreds because Troy Aikman has held and signed it. Most baseball cards are worth the paper they're printed on. A signed Ted Williams card my son has in his collection is worth a few hundred because the legendary player once held it in his hands and signed his name on it. Are you following me? Do you get the point? You're not just another sales rep, truck driver, or programmer. Even if you don't make headlines or tons of money, you're valuable. In spite of the fact that you're embarrassed about something in the past or scared of something in your future, you matter. So you can stop selling yourself short. If you have been held in Christ's hands and have the signature mark of the Spirit of God your heart, you are saved. You have a reason for living. And you have a future that is secure. You're no loser, my friend. You are the child of the King!
Two elderly, excited Southern women were sitting together in the front pew of church listening to a fiery preacher.
When this preacher condemned the sin of stealing, these two ladies cried out at the tops of their lungs, "AMEN, BROTHER!"When the preacher condemned the sin of lust, they yelled again, "PREACH IT, REVEREND!"
And when the preacher condemned the sin of lying, they jumped to their feet and screamed, "RIGHT ON, BROTHER! TELL IT LIKE IT IS... AMEN!"
But when the preacher condemned the sin of gossip, the two got very quiet. One turned to the other and said, "He's quit preaching and now he's meddlin'."
I don't know what's wrong with my television set. I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network both on the same channel. . . . . . .I actually bought a congressman!
When our local doctor began attending church services the minister was absolutely delighted, and it wasn't long before they were helping each other in their work; the minister referring people to the doctor, and vice versa.
One referral from the doctor called at the church office with a note prescribing the minister's last four sermons. The minister was most pleased until he discovered that.... the patient's problem was insomnia!
Shelly was complaining about her husband to her friend Kelly again.
"Surely," said Kelly, "there must be SOMETHING the two of you have in common?"
Shelly replies, "Well, come to think of it, yes.... we got married on the same day."
The best way to avoid temptation is to avoid the tempting situation.
Don't ever come to church without coming as though it were the first time, as though it could be the best time, and as though it might be the last time. -- Vance Havner
The astronaut on the moon decided to look for water, so he pulled out a 3 iron.
posted by joypastordon at 10:14 PM
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