March 25

I joined a health club last year; spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

I have to exercise early in the morning ... before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up our bodies.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

There was the story of the Lutheran who was out hiking when it started to rain. In fact it was torrential, so the hiker crawled into a hollow log for shelter.
After the rain had continued for many hours he found the log had swollen and he was firmly fixed, in fact stuck in the log. No matter how hard he tried he could not escape. Thinking he was a goner, his whole life passed before him to reflect on.
When he came to how much he gave to his church, he shrank so much in shame,
he was able to crawl out safely.

EXTREME BRAINSTORMING
Brainstorming can be a helpful technique when a group or person is facing a challenge or problem. During brainstorming, all ideas are encouraged and accepted. This is not a time to judge or debate the merits of any one suggestion. It is a process to get the creative energy moving.
When brainstorming, it is helpful to throw in some ideas that are extreme. This serves two functions. Not only does it encourage the group to dream big, but the more outrageous suggestions can cause us to laugh, chuckle, or smile. At these moments, our brains are capable of generating more ideas and thinking outside the box. In effect, we become better problem-solvers. So, encourage and engage in extreme brainstorming, let it make you smile, and get those creative ideas flowing!

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." -- George Washington Carver

After a caller told the Humane Society in Battle Creek, Michigan, about two ducks trapped by the ice on a pond, shelter manager Mike Pearson rushed right over. He inched his way out a considerable distance and, as onlookers stood by, gently gathered up the ducks and
made his way back to safety. Both of the wooden decoys were expected to survive.

Better than a Magic Purse
Many of us have at some time dreamt of owning one of those magic purses that would never be empty. No matter how much money we would draw from it, it would remain full! As it turns out, we already have such a contraption in us and this one's worth a lot more than
a trillion enchanted wallets. Our heart can love 24-hours a day without ever running empty. As a matter of fact, the more love we pass to others, the more love we'll have!

School Discipline
I saw a survey that compared the worst discipline problems in public schools in the 1940s and the 1990s. In the 1940s the worst discipline problems in public schools were: talking, chewing gum, making noise, running in the halls, getting out of turn in line,
wearing improper clothes, not putting paper in wastebaskets!
Some of the worst problems in the 1990s [and 2000] are: drug abuse, alcohol abuse, pregnancy, suicide, rape, robbery, assault [not to mention the senseless shootings and killing].

Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Bobby looked up and innocently replied, "Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."

Morris goes on vacation to the Holy Land with his wife and mother-in-law. The mother-in-law dies. They go to an undertaker who explains that they can ship the body home but that it'll cost over $5000, whereas they can bury her in the Holy Land for only $150. Morris says, "We'll ship her home." The undertaker asks, "Are you sure? That's an awfully big expense and
we can do a very nice burial here." Morris says, "Look, 2000 years ago you buried a guy here and three days later he rose from the dead. I just refuse to take that kind of chance.

Three foolish things you can do with money: Deny its importance. Hoard it to yourself. Make it your god.
Early in the last century a man gave $100,000 to build a college in Liberia. By the 1940's the college had grown. Thousands of young Africans had been educated there. On an anniversary of the college's founding, the administration decided it was time to say Thank You to its benefactor. It took months to track him down. You see, the man had lost everything in the crash of 1929 and was living in a little house on the south side of Chicago. Twice he refused to see representatives from the college, but he finally agreed to receive them. At their insistence, he was flown to Africa for a celebration. As he looked over the campus filled with hundreds of students, he whispered to the college president, "The only thing I have kept is what I gave away." Wise man. Only what we give away is ours forever.

Henry Ford once asked an associate about his life goals. The man replied that his goal was to make a million dollars. A few days later Ford gave the man a pair of glasses made out of two silver dollars. He told the man to put them on and asked what he could see. "Nothing," the man said. "The dollars are in the way." Ford told him that he wanted to teach him a lesson: If his only goal was dollars, he would miss a host of greater opportunities. He should invest himself in serving othersnot simply in making money.

Will the world be a better place because we have been here?
When you leave this world, will you leave behind a legacy of love?

One of Stephen Covey's Seven Habits of Highly Successful People is, "Begin with the end in mind." Visualize yourself, Covey says, at your own funeral and listen in your imagination to what people say about you. It matters little what your net worth was. It matters little how many times your name was in the headlines. These things will not last. Only two will: Is the world a better place because you've been here? Did you leave behind a legacy of love?

Money is on everyone''s mind these days. It was no different two thousand years ago. Jesus knew that money was a major matter to most people. That is why he talked more about money than any other subject,

"Give more strokes than pokes."- Rick Warren

"Delays never destroy God's purpose."- Rick Warren

Don’t be easily discouraged by God’s timing! In a culture where things happen at lightning fast speeds, it is easy to get discouraged when things are not progressing as fast as you would like them to -- but don’t give up.
"Whatever you do in life, surround yourself with smart people who will argue with you." - John Wooden (quote found in March 19, 2007 Sports Illustrated)

"Countless people have seen the Cross, but few carry it." - Calvin Miller, Once Upon a Tree

Of the 160 million unchurched Americans, about 60 million (almost four in 10) are eager for a Christian to share the Gospel with them, according to research by Thom and Sam Rainer III.

march 18

The Prodigal Son Parable in the Key of "F"
Luke 15

Feeling footloose and frisky, a feather-brained fellow
forced his fond father to fork over the family
finances. He flew far to foreign fields and frittered
his fortune feasting fabulously with faithless
friends. Finally facing famine and fleeced by his
fellows in folly, he found himself a feed-flinger in a
filthy farmyard. Fairly famished he fain would have
filled his frame with the foraged foods of the fodder
fragments left by the filthy farmyard creatures.
'Fooey', he said, 'My father's flunkies fare far
fancier,' the frazzled fugitive found feverishly,
frankly facing facts. Frustrated by failure and filled
with foreboding he forthwith fled to his family.
Falling at his father's feet, he floundered forlornly.
'Father, I have flunked and fruitlessly forfeited
family favour.'

But the faithful father, forestalling further
flinching frantically flagged the flunkies. 'Fetch
forth the finest fatling and fix a feast.' But the
fugitive's fault-finding frater frowned on the fickle
forgiveness of the former folderol. His fury flashed.

But fussing was futile, for the far-sighted father
figured, such filial fidelity is fine, but what
forbids fervent festivity? The fugitive is found!
"Unfurl the flags, with fanfares flaring! Let fun and
frolic freely flow!" "Former failure is forgotten,
folly is forsaken! And forgiveness forms the
foundation for future fortitude." --Author unknown


When we rely upon organization, we get what organization can do;
when we rely upon education, we get what education can do;
when we rely upon eloquence, we get what eloquence can do, and so on.
I do not undervalue any of these things in their proper place, but when we rely upon prayer, we get what God can do. A.C. Dixon


The Christian does not say, "What cannot be cured must be endured." Christianity says, rather, that these things must be endured because they are part of the cure. They have the strange and mystic power to make whole and strong and so to lead on to victory and the final glory. Christianity is never the dour pessimism that submits. Christianity is optimism that cooperates with the process because it sees that, through suffering and weakness, joy and triumph must come. --G. Campbell Morgan

WHERE THE BIBLE WAS WRITTEN:
The wilderness, The palace, The field, Babylon, Jerusalem, Traveling, Prison, Patmos

A FEW PHONE GROANS
- I tried to call someone the other day from a pay phone but I inserted my donor card instead of my calling card. Man, that call cost me an arm and a leg.
- I took my phone to the beach so I could get call wading.
- If someone is using their cell phone while driving 60 miles per hour, is he or she talking a mile a minute?
- If I ask my girlfriend to marry me over the phone, does that still count as giving her a ring?


Why is it that when you eat too much for lunch, you feel drowsy all afternoon, but when you eat a big meal in the evening, you stay awake all night?

Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in Northern Arizona when she saw an elderly Navajo woman walking on the side of the road. As the trip was a long and quiet one, she stopped the car and asked the woman if she would like a ride. With a silent nod of thanks, the woman got into the car. Resuming the journey, Sally tried in vain to make a bit of small talk with the Navajo woman. The old woman just sat silently, looking at everything she saw, studying every little detail, until she noticed a white bag on the seat next to Sally. "What's in the bag?" asked the old woman.
Sally looked down at the bag and, smiling, said, "It's a box of chocolates. I got it for my husband." The Navajo woman was silent for another moment or two. Then speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said: "Good trade."

Circumstances may appear to wreck our lives and God's plans, but God is not helpless among the ruins. God's love is still working. He comes in and takes the calamity and uses it victoriously, working out His wonderful plan of love. --Eric Liddell

There was a boy who loved to listen to music was bitterly disappointed because he could neither play nor sing. But a kindly gentleman encouraged him with these words: "There are many ways of making music. What matters is the song in your heart." That boy—Antonio Stradivarius—took the man at his word and became the world's greatest violin maker. Prayer: "Dear God, help me to find the most effective way to use my God-given talents and abilities to serve you by serving others in a way that will bring the most glory to you. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus' name, amen."

The new pastor to an aging congregation told them that prune juice would now be served in Holy Communion. When asked why, they were told, “If the Holy Spirit won't move you--the prune juice will!"


Life Outside of Football That there is “life outside of football” may be a necessary eminder for some sports fans and couch potatoes now that Super Bowl XLI is over. Now that the Indianapolis Colts have the Lombardi Trophy in hand, some of them may be wondering what they will do until next season begins. But the line is actually from Tony Dungy, the Colts’ head coach. It wasn’t spoken after last Sunday’s water-logged victory over the Chicago Bears but just after his son James committed suicide 13 months ago. In a speech he made shortly after that tragedy, Dungy talked about all three of his sons. He spoke first of his middle son, Eric, and said his competitive nature is so focused on athletics that “it’s almost a problem.” Then he turned to his youngest son, Jordan, whose rare congenital condition makes him insensitive to pain. “That sounds like it’s good at the beginning, but I promise you it’s not,” said Coach Dungy. “We’ve learned some hurts are really necessary for kids. Pain is necessary for kids to find out the difference between what’s good and what’s harmful.” “Cookies are good,” the coach explained, “but – in Jordan’s mind – if they’re good out on the plate, they’re even better in the oven. He will go right in the oven when my wife’s not looking, reach in, take the rack out, take the pan out, burn his hands – then eat the cookies and burn his tongue and never feel it.” “Pain sometimes lets us know we have a condition that needs to be healed,” Dungy said. “Pain inside sometimes lets us know that spiritually we’re not quite right, and we need to be healed. And that God will send that healing agent right to the spot. Sometimes pain is the only way that will turn us as kids back to the Father.” Only then did Coach Dungy speak of his oldest son, James, who took his life three days before Christmas 2005. He spoke of his family’s pain. He talked about lessons they were learning from it. He and his wife have since joined an organization dedicated to preventing teen suicide.
I’m glad Dungy’s team won the big game. I am impressed by his humility, strength, and deep Christian faith. And I am grateful he could remind all of us there is life outside of football, work, and tragedy. There is the authentic love of God that carries us through, puts everything else in perspective, and reminds us of what really matters. Life isn’t about football. It is about accepting and sharing God’s love.

Henri Nouwen, one of the great spiritual writers of the twentieth century, commented on the “lostness” of both sons in the story of the Prodigal Son.
He wrote, “Did you ever notice how lost you are when you are resentful? It’s a very deep lostness. The younger son gets lost in a much more spectacular way — giving in to his lust and his greed, using women, playing poker, and losing his money. His wrongdoing is very clear-cut. He knows it and everybody else does, too. Because of it he can come back, and he can be forgiven. The problem with resentment is that it is not so clear-cut: It’s not spectacular. And it is not overt, and it can be covered by the appearance of a holy life. Resentment is so pernicious because it sits very deep in you, in your heart, in your bones, and in your flesh, and often you don’t even know it is there. You think you’re so good. But in fact you are lost in a very profound way.


A young single fellow had the fortune of inheriting $250,000 from the estate of his deceased uncle who had died with no direct descendants. The young man went about living the life of his dreams but alas within less than a year the large sum had all been spent and he was broke again. When the young man’s father heard that his son was broke, he asked him in astonishment, “What did you do with all that money?” “Well,” the son confessed, “I spent $60,000 on a new sports car, and $20,000 taking my girlfriend on a spring break trip to Tahiti, and then I went through $75,000 on my weekend in Las Vegas, and $15,000 on a toga party for my frat, and I’m afraid the remaining $80,000 I just squandered foolishly.”

"Manage by objectives. Tell people exactly what you want them to do and then get out of their way." -- Brian Tracy

"Their's is an endless road, a hopeless maze, who seek for goods before they seek for God." -- St. Bernard of Clairvaux (1091-1153)

"What we see depends mainly on what we look for." -- John Lubbock

"There's only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience."

"Happiness is not a station you arrive at, but a manner of traveling." -- Margaret Lee Runbeck

March 11

Our Chaotic Life
This notice appeared in the window of a coat store in Nottingham, England: "We have been established for over 100 years and have been pleasing and displeasing customers ever since. We have made money and lost money, suffered the effects of coal nationalization, coat rationing, government control and bad payers. We have been cussed and discussed, messed about, lied to, held up, robbed and swindled. The only reason we stay in business is to see what happens next."

Picture of Jesus: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8M4_IlbaZHA

The Bible without the Holy Spirit is a sundial by moonlight. --D. L. Moody

Using Up the Ground
Soil was at a premium in Israel. It was not unusual for a vineyard owner to give a little bit of his soil up for a fruit tree but the tree took up the best soil, the deepest soil, and required the most water. A fig tree doesn’t grow fruit until three years after planting. The owner in this story, had given the tree “due season” to bear fruit and yet the tree bore no fruit. It took up valuable space and resources. The owner questioned why the tree was allowed to “even use up ground.”
God had given the Israelites the choicest ground. Their land possessed everything necessary to make themselves a great nation, indeed, a light to all nations. They were strategically positioned to send the fruit of God north and south, east and west; but instead, in-fighting continued to make them a worthless fruit tree.
Everyone one of us and all of our churches will have to answer (from God’s perspective) this same question; “Why does it even use up the ground?”

"The glum, sour faces of many Christians. ... They rather give the impression that, instead of coming from the Father's joyful banquet, they have just come from the Sheriff who has auctioned off their sins and now are sorry they can't get them back again." - Helmut Thielicke

THE BIBLE
When the King James Version was released in 1611, the translators included an "Address to the Reader," which said, in condensed form: "Scripture is a paradise of trees of life, which brings forth fruits every month, and the leaves for medicine. It is a shower of heavenly bread and a cellar full of oil vessels whereby all our necessities may be provided. It is a pantry of
wholesome food against moldy traditions, a pharmacist's shop against poisoned heresies; a code of profitable laws against rebellious spirit; a treasure of costly jewels against beggarly rudiments, a foundation of most pure water springing up into everlasting life."
We are not citizens of this world trying to make our way to heaven; we are citizens of heaven trying to make our way through this world. That radical Christian insight can be lifechanging. We are not to live so as to earn God’s love, inherit heaven, and purchase our salvation. All those are given to us as gifts; gifts bought by Jesus on the cross and handed over to us. We are to live as God’s redeemed, as heirs of heaven, and as citizens of another land: the Kingdom of God…. We live as those who are on a journey home; a home we know will have the lights on and the door open and our Father waiting for us when we arrive. That means in all adversity our worship of God is joyful, our life is hopeful, our future is secure. There is nothing we can lose on earth that can rob us of the treasures God has given us and will give us. --The Landisfarne, via The Anglican Digest


"We lose the approval of The Lord when we seek the applause of men.”

CELL PHONE vs. BIBLE
- I wonder what would happen if we treated our Bible like we treat our cellphone?
- What if we carried it around in our purses or pockets?
- What if we flipped through it several time a day?
- What if we turned back to go get it if we forgot it?
- What if we used it to receive messages from the text?
- What if we treated it like we couldn't live without it?
- What if we gave it to kids as gifts?
- What if we used it when we traveled?
- What if we used it in case of emergency?
- Unlike our cell phone, we don't have to worry about our Bible being disconnected because Jesus already paid the bill.

When you first look at all the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, it's hard to believe there's actually
a picture in there. But there's an important key to working a puzzle. You need to keep referring to the picture on the box. That's what helps you know what the finished product is supposed to look like.
Do you ever look at the jumbled pieces of your life, wondering how they could ever fit
together? God has given us a picture of what we'll look like when He's finished with us.
The book of Hebrews tells us that Jesus is "the radiance of the glory of God and the exact
imprint of his nature." Jesus is our picture of holiness. As we give all the pieces of our lives to
God, He'll help us grow into the image of His Son.
Are you growing in holiness? There's one way to know. Study what God's Word says
about Jesus, and then ask whether you're becoming more like Him.

When we find something we like at the store, one of the first things we do is look at the price tag. "Whoa! It looks really cute hanging right there on that rack!"
Wouldn't it be nice if temptation were the same way, if we understood the cost of sin right
up front? If the forbidden fruit had been rotten and crawling with worms, do you think Eve
would have taken any? But Genesis tells us, "When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree
was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she
took some and ate it." She acted on her immediate desires without looking at the price tag.
You'll be faced with a lot of decisions today. Would you ask God to give you discernment?
He can help you recognize the cost of sin, no matter how attractive it looks at the moment.


"Men occasionally stumble on the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing had happened." Winston Churchill

"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter." Mark Twain

During a road trip I stopped in a small town to grab a bite to eat. I walked into a local pizza place and the first thing I noticed was a sign on the wall advising: "Price. Quality. Service. Pick Any Two."

The evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

Q: What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A: A Hot Cross bunny.
Q: What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards? A: A receding hareline
Q: Why didn't the egg cross the road? A: Because he wasn't a chicken yet!
Q: What day does an egg hate the most? A: Fry-days.

The Bible suggests we should do to live out our faith. To help you remember think "PIGS SEW"! A disciple of Jesus should try to:
PRAY daily;
INVITE others to learn about Jesus;
GIVE financially:
STUDY the Bible daily;

SERVE in your congregation and in your community;
ENCOURAGE others;
WORSHIP regularly.

March 4

My wife clipped a job listing out of the paper for me. She said it wasn't much to start out... but a huge pay raise. It read, "Salary: 23k to start. 401k after 1 yr."


While watching a movie recently, I couldn't hear the dialogue over the chatter of the two women sitting in front of me. Unable to bear it any longer, I tapped one of them on the
shoulder. "Excuse me," I said, "I can't hear." "I should hope not," she replied sharply. "This is a private conversation."


- Some minds are like concrete thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
- You will never stand alone while standing on the Word of God. -- Kathryn Souza-Wine
- Forgiveness is almost a selfish act because of its immense benefits to the one who forgives. - Lawana Blackwell
- "We make ourselves rich by making our wants few." -Henry David Thor
- "I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean." - G. K. Chesterton
- "Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell."
- Love is not blind- it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less. - Rabbi Julius Gordon
- Worriers spend a lot of time shoveling smoke. Claude McDonald
- If you believe what you like in the gospels, and reject what you don't like, it is not the gospel you believe, but yourself. --Augustine

"My ancestry goes all the way back to Alexander the Great," bragged one lady to another in their social club. "How far does your family go back?" She asked "I don't know," was the reply. "All of our records were lost in the flood."

In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing. ~ Mignon McLaughlin
The moments of happiness we enjoy take us by surprise. It is not that we seize them, but that they seize us. -Ashley Montagu
"Remember that children, marriages, and flower gardens reflect the kind of care they get." - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
I have left a can of motivation somewhere and I cant find it I even looked under the sofa ... all I found under there though was a can of "procrastination" and a jar of "Ill do it later" which I think one is name brand and the other must be store brand because they are exactly the same thing!
People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can't find them, make them. -- G.B. Shaw


If you want your dreams to come true, don't oversleep.
The smallest good deed is better than the grandest intention.
Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important.
The best vitamin for making friends ... B1.
The 10 commandments are not multiple choice.
The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.
Minds are like parachutes ... they function only when open.
Ideas won't work unless YOU do.
One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.
One who lacks the courage to start has already finished.
The heaviest thing to carry is a grudge.
You don't learn safety rules by accident.
We lie the loudest when we lie to ourselves.
Jumping to conclusions can be bad exercise.
A turtle makes progress only when it sticks its head out.
One thing you can give and still keep ... is your word.
A friend walks in when everyone else walks out.
The pursuit of happiness is the chase of a lifetime!

Reality Check Well, Think About It! by Stan Mitchell
"Imagine for a moment," Jim Baird asks, "what theories alien sociologists would form about our culture if they were judging us simply by the television programming we have been sending them at the speed of light over the last thirty years"
"They would," he remarks, "know a lot about handguns and how to wreck cars." Thanks to laugh tracks they would have "elaborate" and "wildly inaccurate" theories about what we think is funny. And they would conclude that the greatest decision in human existence, the one that makes all the difference is "what mixture of caramel-colored, gas-laden sugar water to drink."
But our space aliens would not know one thing about Americans from watching television. They could not possibly know that nine out of ten of us believe in God, eight out of ten of us pray regularly, that seven out of ten Americans are church members, and that six out of ten Americans claim that religion is the dominant factor in our lives.
Our alien scholars would have hardly any information on religion at all. There might, once
in a while, be a program which depicts a religious person as either hypocritical or hopelessly out of touch with reality.
Religion on television has been sequestered. There is religion, and then there is the "real world," according to this view of life.
In reality, however, there is a God. His son acted decisively in history to solve humanity's most profound problem. His word provides guidance for the greatest reality of all.
He will judge the living and the dead. He will consign every soul, living and dead, to an eternal destiny.
The aliens wouldn't know that from watching television. The tragedy is, neither will many
Americans.
"Do not be amazed at this, for a time is coming when all who are in their graves will hear his voice and come out – those who have done good will rise to live, and those who have done evil will rise to be condemned" (John 5:28,29).
Could someone please direct those aliens to a bookstore?

w "In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit." -- Albert Schweitzer
"Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell." -- Author Unknown


"God speaks in the silence of the heart. Listening is the beginning of prayer." -- Mother Teresa
"There are painters who transform the sun to a yellow spot, but there are others who with the help of their art and their intelligence transform a yellow spot into the sun." -- Pablo Picasso quite a time on the TV show last week—who would have thought that
A Quaker farmer was milking his cows, and near the end of the milking one of the cows lifted tail, swished him hard across the face, shifted legs and, with the free leg, kicked both the farmer and the milk pail (nearly full of milk) spilling it into the farmer's shoes.
"Oh, dear cow," said the Quaker, "thou knowest that my pacifism dost not allow me to beat thee, that I canst not even curse thee for these impertinent actions. Thou mayest believe that thou canst escape retribution for this pagan action. And, thou mayest even thinkest thee smarter than myself.
"But what thou knowest not is that I can sell thee to Ole, my Norwegian
Lutheran neighbor, who canst beat the living tar out of thee."
There is only one group of people who don't have problems and they're all dead. Problems are a sign of life. So the more problems you have, the more alive you are. Norman Vincent Peale (1898 - 1993)


Thought for the week: "Make big decisions in the calm."-- Dwight D. Eisenhower

"There are plenty of rules for attaining success, but none of them work unless you do!" -- Mark Twain

"Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open. You're able to benefit from the unique viewpoints of others, without being crippled by your own judgment. -- Ralph Marston

"To make mistakes is human; to stumble is common-place; to be able to laugh at yourself is maturity.-- William Arthur Ward

"Train up a child in the way he should go, but be sure to go that way yourself."

Rejection and Refusal to Listen
Robert Fulton, an artist and engineer was responsible in the early 1800's for putting sailing ships out of business. He made the steamboat a standard on the open seas. It is said that he presented his idea to Napoleon. After a few minutes of this presentation Napoleon is reported to have said, "What, sir, you would make a ship sail against the wind and currents by lighting a bonfire under her decks? I pray you excuse me. I have no time to listen to such nonsense."


Beagles Can’t Climb Trees There's a Peanuts cartoon that speaks to the Gospel:.
In the first frame, Lucy is standing next to a tree. Looking up, she shouts to Linus, "What are you doing in that tree?" Linus answers from the branches of the tree, "Looking for something." Then he adds, "Can you see Snoopy? We climbed up here together, but now I don't see him." Lucy unsympathetically shouts back up the tree, "Beagles can't climb trees." The next frame shows Snoopy falling out of the tree right on his head with a loud "klunk." "You're right!" Snoopy concludes. Then Lucy lets Snoopy have it, "You stupid Beagle, what are you doing climbing around in a tree?" Snoopy's sore head is still spinning.Linus interrupts from the tree, "Don't yell at him.... We're trying to find a strange creature in a nest...." Lucy walks off saying, "You're both crazy! Go ahead and knock yourselves out! I couldn't care less!!" Then Snoopy with his head still sore and spinning things, "Rats...I was hoping for a hug!" When we’ve been stupid and we have hurt ourselves we generally like to be hugged. Children know this; Snoopy knew it; but we adults sometimes get it wrong. We don’t like to admit our faults. God help us if there are a lot of Lucy’s around. Jesus looks out over the city of Jerusalem, badly in need of divine comfort. In their stupidity they have killed the Prophets and stoned the messengers of God. They need to experience God’s forgiveness but they are doing it again. Jesus has come with a word of grace and they will not listen. As a result the house of Israel will be left desolate.
There was an Indian Chief who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest,in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away. The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall. When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen.
The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted. The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise. The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen. The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.
The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only one season in the tree's life.
He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up. If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall.
Moral: Don't let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest. Don't judge life by one difficult season. Persevere through the difficult patches and better times are sure to come.
"I love those signs along the highway that say, 'Litter Removal Next 2 Miles.' That's when I start chucking my trash out the window."

February 25

Mother Theresa's prayer:
May today there be peace within. May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.


The Devil's Future "Resist the devil and he will flee from you."
A friend shared with me her way of handling the deceiver-tempter: "When Satan comes to remind me about my past, I remind him about his future."
One thing Satan does is continually accuse us before God. Knowing that he does this, we can remind him not only about his future in hell but also that Christ shed his blood on the cross and gave his life to pay for our sins and has washed them all away. So what's there to accuse us of if we have confessed our sins to Christ and asked for and accepted his forgiveness?
Furthermore, because Christ died for us and cleansed us from our sins, we can, in Jesus' name resist the devil and, as James said, he will flee from us. Satan hates the name of Jesus. Be sure to mention it when he comes to tempt you.
Prayer: "Dear God, thank you that you forgive all who confess their sins and ask for your forgiveness. Help me always to resist the devil in Jesus' name, knowing that he will flee from me and has no power over me. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

He who governed the world before I was born shall take care of it likewise when I am dead. My part is to improve the present moment. --John Wesley

Four-year-old Jason was visiting his grandparents. Grandpa was in his study intently reading. Jason walked in carrying a peach, said something Grandpa didn't catch, and handed the peach to him. Thinking his wife had sent him a snack, Grandpa took it and ate it. Just as he swallowed the last bite, Jason, with lip quivering, said, "But, Pap, I didn't want you to eat it. I just wanted you to get the worm out!"

A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday.
"I'd love to be six again," she replied.
On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear - everything there was! Wow!
Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to a McDonald's they went, where her husband ordered her a Big Mac along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.
Then it was off to a movie - the latest Star Wars epic, and hot dogs, popcorn, Pepsi Cola and M&Ms. What a fabulous adventure!
Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed. He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?"
One eye opened. "You idiot, I meant my dress size."
The moral of this story is: If a woman speaks and a man is actually listening, he will still get it wrong.

"A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones who need the advice." - Bill Cosby

"If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead." - Johnny Carson

"The world cares very little about what a man or woman knows; it is what the man or woman is able to do that counts." -- Booker T. Washington, 1856-1915, Educator and Reformer

"Losers make promises they often break. Winners make commitments they always keep." -- Denis Waitley


HOW TO DRIVE IN PHOENIX:
1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: "FEE-NICKS".
2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 7:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 85 mph. On Loop 101, your speed is expected to match the highway number. Anything less is considered "Wussy".
4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Phoenix has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, East Valley, SUV-driving, cell phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.
6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can get you shot.
7. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Phoenix. Detour barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting.
8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, barrels, cones, cows, horses, cats, mattresses, shredded tires, squirrels, rabbits, crows, vultures, javelinas, roadrunners, and the coyotes feeding on any of these items.
9. Maricopa Freeway, Papago Freeway and the "I-10" are the same road.
10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally activated."
11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 70 in a 55-65 mph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off" accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
12. For summer driving, it is advisable to wear potholders on your hands.

Prevailing Sins
A recent survey of readers ranked areas of greatest spiritual challenge to them:
1. Materialism
2. Pride
3. Self-centeredness
4. Laziness
5. (Tie) Anger/Bitterness
5. (Tie) Sexual lust.
7. Envy
8. Gluttony
9. Lying
Survey noted temptations were more potent when they had neglected their time with God (81 percent) and when they were physically tired (57 percent). Resisting temptation was accomplished by prayer (84 percent), avoiding compromising situations (76 percent), Bible study (66 percent), and being accountable to someone (52 percent).

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

Now that lawyers can advertise, says a reporter, you had better brace yourself for the following pitch from one who specializes in divorces: "Satisfaction guaranteed or your honey back."


A husband visited a marriage counselor and said, "When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would
run around barking. Now after ten years it's all different. I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking."
"Why complain?" said the counselor, "You're still getting the same service."

Normally all of the good choir members of the West Side Baptist Church in Beatrice, Nebraska, came to church on Wednesday night to practice, and most of them even came early. That meant they showed up well before the 7:30 starting time.
But one night, March 1, 1950, one by one, two by two, they all had excuses for being late. Marilyn, the church pianist overslept on her after-dinner nap, so she and her mother were late. One girl, a high-school sophomore, was having trouble with her homework. That delayed her, so she was late. One couple couldn’t get their car started. They, and those they were to pick up, were subsequently late.
In fact, all 18 choir members, including the pastor and his wife, were late. Every single person had a good excuse.
So, on that Wednesday evening, at 7:30, the time the choir rehearsal was supposed to begin, not one soul was in the choir loft. This had never happened before.
But here’s the rest of the story. That night, the only night in the history of the church that the choir wasn’t starting to practice at 7:30, was the night that there was a gas leak in the basement of the West Side Baptist Church. At precisely the time at which the choir would have been singing, the gas leak was ignited by the church furnace and the whole church blew up. And … The furnace room was right below the choir loft!

"All that God does, God does well; and all that we do God can redeem."

You're not having a bad hair day; you're suffering from "rebellious follicle syndrome."

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them." -- Mother Teresa

"Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age." -- Jeanne Moreau


Noah's Flood?
A visitor to a small country church in Arizona once asked, "Does it ever rain in Arizona?"
A rancher quickly answered, "Yes, it does. Do you remember in the Bible where it rained for 40 days and 40 nights?"
The visitor replied, "Yes, I'm familiar with Noah's flood."
"Well," the rancher puffed up, "We got about two and a half inches of that."

Free radio music site on the internet: www.accuradio.com

REVENGE
Boxing great Muhammad Ali has said that when he was a child his parents gave him a brand new bicycle. A few days later someone stole it. A policeman asked him what he was going to do if he caught the boy who stole it. Ali said that he didn't know.
So the policeman took him to the gym and began teaching him how to box. Ali said, "To this day I never found my bike, but every time I got in the ring, I'd look across at my opponent and say to myself, that's the guy who stole my bike!"

"Dear IRS: I would like to cancel my subscription.
Please remove my name from your mailing list..."

"There is a God-shaped vacuum in the heart of every person, and it can never be filled
by any created thing. It can only be filled by God, made known through Jesus Christ." -- Blaise Pascal

"How come you never see this headline: 'Psychic wins lottery'?"

Wife: You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
Husband: You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.

Fall seven times, stand up eight.-- Japanese Proverb

February 18

There is a dawn that follows every darkness,
hope that follows every despair,
a beginning that follows every ending.

COLD ‘NUFF FOR YA?
60 above zero: Arizonians turn on the heat. People in Iowa plant gardens.
50 above zero: Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in Cedar Rapids sunbathe.
40 above zero: Italian & English cars won't start. People in Iowa drive with the windows down.
32 above zero: Distilled water freezes. The water in Des Moines gets thicker.
20 above zero: Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats. People in Iowa throw on a flannel shirt.
15 above zero: New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Iowa have the last cookout before it gets cold.
0 People in Miami all die. Iowans close the windows.
10 below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico .. People in Iowa get out their winter coats.
25 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. The Girl Scouts in Iowa are selling cookies door to door. (True!)
40 below zero: Washington DC runs out of hot air. People in Iowa let the dogs sleep indoors.
100 below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Iowa get upset because they can't start the Mini-Van.
460 below zero: ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale.) People in Iowa start saying..."Cold 'nuff fer ya?"
500 below zero: Hell freezes over. Iowa public schools will open 2 hours late.


THE SEVEN MODERN SINS:
Politics...without Principles
Pleasures.. without Conscience
Wealth...without Work
Knowledge...without Character
Industry.. without Morality
Science ....... without Humanity
Worship.....without Sacrifice

Whenever I find myself in the cellar
of affliction, I always look about for
the wine.--Samuel Rutherford


Did you heard about the nine-year-old whose sister was just starting school. He gave her some advice. "Don't ever learn to spell 'Cat,'" he warned. "Once you do that, they just keep on giving you harder words."

In the PEANUTS cartoon, the team "statistician" brings Charlie Brown, the manager, his report. "I've compiled the statistics on our baseball team for last season," Linus says. "In 12 games we ALMOST scored a run and in 9 games the other team ALMOST didn't score before the first out. In right field, Lucy ALMOST caught 3 balls and once ALMOST made the right play."
"We led the league," he concludes, "in 'almosts,' Charlie Brown."

When you need to use the 411 information option, simply dial 1 (800) FREE 411, or 1 (800) 373-3411 without incurring any charge at all.

"The most pathetic person in the world is someone who has sight but has no vision." - Helen Keller

Instruction in youth is like engraving in stone.-- Columbian Proverb

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
Don't cry because its over; smile because it happened.
Most of us go to our grave with our music still inside of us.
Why is it that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for them.
We could learn a lot from crayons; some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to learn to live in the same box.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.