August 20
"Snowflakes are one of nature's most fragile things, but just look at what they can do when they stick together." The church is a most fragile thing, because it certainly doesn't take much to pull us apart sometimes. But when we are awakened spiritually, when we are returning to God, when we are united, just look at what we can do when we are sticking together!
--Rocky Henriques
The History of Medication
2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.
1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer.
1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion.
1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill.
1985 A.D. - That pill is ineffective. Here, take this antibiotic.
2000 A.D. - That antibiotic is unhealthy. Here, eat this root.
A diplomatic husband said to his wife, "How do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?"
A teacher asked one of her pupils, "What's the nation's capital?" The reply was, "Washington DC." On being asked what the "DC" stood for, the pupil promptly replied, "Dot com."
The new roll call of planets, starting closest to the sun, would be: Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Ceres, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto, Charon and Xena. (Xena is officially known as UB313 until the IAU gets around to formally naming it.)
Snow White's seven dwarfs are more well-known than the U.S. Supreme Court Justices, according to a recent Zogby International poll." Three quarters of Americans can correctly identify two of the seven dwarfs but only a quarter can name two Supreme Court Justices. Seventy-four percent identified the Three Stooges — Larry, Curly and Moe — but only 42 percent could name the three branches of the U.S. government.
Worship, friends, joy Could it be that we should put a sign over the doors of our churches: Danger Inside!? Then the worship folder might have a heading that says, "This is a warning. In this service you may actually encounter the holy God who has awesome power, and an intense interest in a relationship with you. You may be totally changed here. You may have to leave your worries and anxieties here. (Then what will occupy your time?) You may be emboldened to live a courageous, victorious life, fearful of nothing, able for anything. You may also find the most loyal of friends who wear you out with their concern and love, who seem to want to have a steadfast relationship with you to the point where you may say "Enough already!" Finally, in this place you may receive so much joy you simply won't know what to do with it except to share it with others wherever you go. What a dangerous bore you may become! This is indeed a hazardous place and we have warned you.
“Good morning to you down there! Well it could be worse, but I see a pretty big jam-up at the intersection of Selfishness and Sacrifice today, you need to beware that you don’t get bogged down at that spot. You might want to take the bypass through Psalm 86:11 which will lead you around Brokenness and into Whole-Hearted Devotion. Be sure to watch out for the outbreak of Wickedness that will keep you swatting at your dark side near the off-ramp to Despair. You may need to slow down and refer to your map which outlines the Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth. But if you shoot straight down Purpose 101, persevere through the curves of Corruption, and pray over the potholes of Pride you should be home in no time!”
The average wedding costs between $20,000 and $25,000. - Source: Hallmark.com
"Satan never plays fair; he is a deceiver and a liar. He does not like you or me, and it might surprise you that he has a plan of destruction for your life. The only hope for people is to know the true and living God." - Wayde Goodall, The Battle, Creation House, 2005
"Make sure you are in trouble for Jesus, because if the idols that are surrounding you are leaving you alone, chances are that's because you are worshipping them and not walking the way of the cross." - Ronald Boyd-MacMillan, Faith that Endures, Revell, 2006
A man and his wife were arguing about family members. "It's just not right", the wife said. "You don't like anybody in my family!"
"That's not true," replied the husband. "I like your mother-in-law much better than my mother-in-law."
The minister delivered his Sunday morning service as usual but this particular Sunday it was considerably longer than normal. However, it was so well prepared and had so many wonderful scripture quotations he just knew it would be a big hit with the congregation.
At the end of the service he stood shaking hands with parishioners as they exited. One man paused and said, "Your sermon, Pastor, was simply wonderful - so invigorating and inspiring and refreshing."
About the time the minister broke out in a big smile the man completed his comment by adding, "Why I felt like a new man when I woke up!"
"Do you love me with all your heart and soul?" asked Becky.
"Mmm hmm." replied Dave.
"Do you think I'm the most beautiful girl in the world?"
"Mmm hmm."
"Do you think my lips are like rose petals?"
"Mmm hmm."
"Oh Dave," gushed Becky, "You say the most beautiful things!"
Was there a telethon that wiped out lumbago? Nobody complains of that anymore. Maybe that's what castor oil cured, because I never hear mothers threatening kids with castor oil anymore.
** When the hot word of God is poured over a cold, cold world, things break, and it is into that brokenness that we are called, into whatever big or small piece we find in front of us, with fire in our bones, to show a frightened world that it is not the heat of fire that we fear, but the chill that lies ahead if the fire goes out. -- Barbara Brown Taylor
There are only two things a child will share willingly:
communicable diseases and their mother's age.
Christ in Me and I in Him
There is an story about minister walking along the ocean with his small son. The boy questioned his father about Sunday's sermon. The boy said, "Dad, I cannot understand how Christ can live in us and we live in him at the same time." Further down the beach, the father noticed an empty bottle with a cork in it. Taking the bottle, he half filled it with water, recorked it and flung it out into the ocean.
As they watched the bottle bob up and down he said, "Son, the sea is in the bottle and the bottle is in the sea. It is a picture of life in Christ. You live under the Lordship of Christ and He lives in you."
Experience comes from what we have done. Wisdom comes from what we have done badly. Theodore Levitt, Harvard Business School
A Hunger For God
Someone has said that our model for living today is more like Madonna, the "material girl," than it is like Mother Teresa. Have we somehow confused our wants with our needs? So, we may be hungry not hungry for food, but hungry in another way. In one of her books, Mother Teresa writes: ?The spiritual poverty of the Western world is much greater than the physical poverty of Third World people. You in the West have millions of people who suffer such terrible loneliness and emptiness. They feel unwanted and unloved ... These people are not hungry in a physical sense but they are in another way. They know they need something more than money, yet they don't know what it is. What they are missing really is a living relationship with God.?
There are 2 secrets to understanding women........ and unfortunately, no one knows either of them :-)
I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
--Rocky Henriques
The History of Medication
2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.
1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer.
1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion.
1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill.
1985 A.D. - That pill is ineffective. Here, take this antibiotic.
2000 A.D. - That antibiotic is unhealthy. Here, eat this root.
A diplomatic husband said to his wife, "How do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?"
A teacher asked one of her pupils, "What's the nation's capital?" The reply was, "Washington DC." On being asked what the "DC" stood for, the pupil promptly replied, "Dot com."
The new roll call of planets, starting closest to the sun, would be: Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Ceres, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto, Charon and Xena. (Xena is officially known as UB313 until the IAU gets around to formally naming it.)
Snow White's seven dwarfs are more well-known than the U.S. Supreme Court Justices, according to a recent Zogby International poll." Three quarters of Americans can correctly identify two of the seven dwarfs but only a quarter can name two Supreme Court Justices. Seventy-four percent identified the Three Stooges — Larry, Curly and Moe — but only 42 percent could name the three branches of the U.S. government.
Worship, friends, joy Could it be that we should put a sign over the doors of our churches: Danger Inside!? Then the worship folder might have a heading that says, "This is a warning. In this service you may actually encounter the holy God who has awesome power, and an intense interest in a relationship with you. You may be totally changed here. You may have to leave your worries and anxieties here. (Then what will occupy your time?) You may be emboldened to live a courageous, victorious life, fearful of nothing, able for anything. You may also find the most loyal of friends who wear you out with their concern and love, who seem to want to have a steadfast relationship with you to the point where you may say "Enough already!" Finally, in this place you may receive so much joy you simply won't know what to do with it except to share it with others wherever you go. What a dangerous bore you may become! This is indeed a hazardous place and we have warned you.
“Good morning to you down there! Well it could be worse, but I see a pretty big jam-up at the intersection of Selfishness and Sacrifice today, you need to beware that you don’t get bogged down at that spot. You might want to take the bypass through Psalm 86:11 which will lead you around Brokenness and into Whole-Hearted Devotion. Be sure to watch out for the outbreak of Wickedness that will keep you swatting at your dark side near the off-ramp to Despair. You may need to slow down and refer to your map which outlines the Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth. But if you shoot straight down Purpose 101, persevere through the curves of Corruption, and pray over the potholes of Pride you should be home in no time!”
The average wedding costs between $20,000 and $25,000. - Source: Hallmark.com
"Satan never plays fair; he is a deceiver and a liar. He does not like you or me, and it might surprise you that he has a plan of destruction for your life. The only hope for people is to know the true and living God." - Wayde Goodall, The Battle, Creation House, 2005
"Make sure you are in trouble for Jesus, because if the idols that are surrounding you are leaving you alone, chances are that's because you are worshipping them and not walking the way of the cross." - Ronald Boyd-MacMillan, Faith that Endures, Revell, 2006
A man and his wife were arguing about family members. "It's just not right", the wife said. "You don't like anybody in my family!"
"That's not true," replied the husband. "I like your mother-in-law much better than my mother-in-law."
The minister delivered his Sunday morning service as usual but this particular Sunday it was considerably longer than normal. However, it was so well prepared and had so many wonderful scripture quotations he just knew it would be a big hit with the congregation.
At the end of the service he stood shaking hands with parishioners as they exited. One man paused and said, "Your sermon, Pastor, was simply wonderful - so invigorating and inspiring and refreshing."
About the time the minister broke out in a big smile the man completed his comment by adding, "Why I felt like a new man when I woke up!"
"Do you love me with all your heart and soul?" asked Becky.
"Mmm hmm." replied Dave.
"Do you think I'm the most beautiful girl in the world?"
"Mmm hmm."
"Do you think my lips are like rose petals?"
"Mmm hmm."
"Oh Dave," gushed Becky, "You say the most beautiful things!"
Was there a telethon that wiped out lumbago? Nobody complains of that anymore. Maybe that's what castor oil cured, because I never hear mothers threatening kids with castor oil anymore.
** When the hot word of God is poured over a cold, cold world, things break, and it is into that brokenness that we are called, into whatever big or small piece we find in front of us, with fire in our bones, to show a frightened world that it is not the heat of fire that we fear, but the chill that lies ahead if the fire goes out. -- Barbara Brown Taylor
There are only two things a child will share willingly:
communicable diseases and their mother's age.
Christ in Me and I in Him
There is an story about minister walking along the ocean with his small son. The boy questioned his father about Sunday's sermon. The boy said, "Dad, I cannot understand how Christ can live in us and we live in him at the same time." Further down the beach, the father noticed an empty bottle with a cork in it. Taking the bottle, he half filled it with water, recorked it and flung it out into the ocean.
As they watched the bottle bob up and down he said, "Son, the sea is in the bottle and the bottle is in the sea. It is a picture of life in Christ. You live under the Lordship of Christ and He lives in you."
Experience comes from what we have done. Wisdom comes from what we have done badly. Theodore Levitt, Harvard Business School
A Hunger For God
Someone has said that our model for living today is more like Madonna, the "material girl," than it is like Mother Teresa. Have we somehow confused our wants with our needs? So, we may be hungry not hungry for food, but hungry in another way. In one of her books, Mother Teresa writes: ?The spiritual poverty of the Western world is much greater than the physical poverty of Third World people. You in the West have millions of people who suffer such terrible loneliness and emptiness. They feel unwanted and unloved ... These people are not hungry in a physical sense but they are in another way. They know they need something more than money, yet they don't know what it is. What they are missing really is a living relationship with God.?
There are 2 secrets to understanding women........ and unfortunately, no one knows either of them :-)
I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
posted by joypastordon at 10:29 PM
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